Deadpan are Neil, Nick and Vic, and they make cards that tell the truth. Their motto is ‘If you can’t say something nice, say something factually accurate.’ You can shop their range here. 

How did you get into designing cards together? Was it something you always wanted to do?

Well, Neil and Nick sat opposite each other in their day jobs as copywriters. People kept passing round awful leaving cards for people we hated, and well, what the hell do you write? ‘These cards should tell the truth’, we said to ourselves. So our first card said ‘You are moving from one mediocre job to another.’ We kept making each other laugh with lines like that, so a soon-to-be moderately successful card brand was born.

Luckily we got Vic involved to make sure we didn’t actually lose money. She’s the numbers, and Neil and Nick are the words.

What inspires your work? Is your own sense of humour as deadpan as your cards?

Our inspiration is our friend Sandra. She’s the most deadpan person we know. We were once playing ‘Who would play you in the film of your life?’ and Sandra said, ‘In Neil’s case, it would need to be someone with a red face.’ Now we spend our lives thinking: What Would Sandra Say?

What is your working process?

Our process is Nick and Neil sitting down and bickering over whether something’s funny or not – we both think we know better than the other one. Then Vic tells us neither of us are that funny.

Occasionally we put a card in the range that tickles us but we’re sure no-one would buy, and then it flies off the shelves. ‘You have eyes’ has sold brilliantly. Shows how much we know.

Where the magic happens (shower thoughts!)

Has lockdown changed how you work/your daily routine, if so how have you adapted?

It’s made Nick even less likely to see or talk to anyone. Vic is trying not to kill three children. Neil is even more prone to early afternoon naps.

Has lockdown given you some inspiration for more deadpan cards?

We’ve been far too busy for that. Nick’s built a replica of Stonehenge out of shallots. 

What’s a recent TV binge / Netflix must see?

Neil will always binge Doctor Who, and Nick just rewatches all seven seasons of Buffy over and over again.

What’s one of the first things you did as lockdown started to lift? (Let us guess, pub?)

We’re still staying in. How can you leave when Lodgers for Codgers is on TV? (Seriously, it’s brilliant).

Thanks to Neil, Nick & Vic for taking part. Shop the full range of Deadpan cards here.